Hellboy (2019)

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"You will never realize how much you need Guillermo del Toro in your life until you see the reboot of “Hellboy.”"

Christy Lemire



Hellboy (2019)
Rippedoffbeforeneveragain.jpg
Genre: Superhero
Photography: Color
Running Time: 121 minutes
Country: United States
Release Date: April 12, 2019
Directed by: Neil Marshall
Written by: Andrew Cosby
Distributed by: Lionsgate
Starring: David Harbour
Ian McShane
Sasha Lane
Daniel Dae Kim
Thomas Haden Church
Milla Jovovich
Previous film: Hellboy II: The Golden ArmyGMW


Hellboy is a 2019 British-American supernatural superhero film based on the Dark Horse Comics character of the same name. Directed by Neil Marshall, the film stars David Harbour in the title role, alongside Milla Jovovich, Ian McShane, Sasha Lane, Daniel Dae Kim, and Thomas Haden Church. It is a reboot of the Hellboy film series, and the third live-action film in the franchise.

Plot

While battling a trio of rampaging giants, the legendary half-demon Hellboy encounters Nimue the Blood Queen, an ancient resurrected sorceress who's out to avenge a past betrayal. Suddenly caught in a clash between the supernatural and the human, Hellboy soon becomes hell-bent on stopping Nimue without triggering the end of the world.

Why It Sucks

This is sure to earn a "cult-classic" status...
  1. This remake is completely inferior to what made the original films so great. It all feels different, as it unnecessarily made loads of changes up to the point where it doesn’t even feel like a Hellboy movie. It has absolutely no charm and no heart, and just does whatever it can to exist.
  2. This reboot wasn’t even supposed to exist in the first place, either. In fact, it was originally supposed to be Hellboy III, but unfortunately, Mike Mignola and Lawerence Gordon treated Guillermo Del Toro unfairly, by replacing him with an entirely new director. Outraged by all this, Del Toro left the production, followed suit by Ron Perlman, who refused to work on the film with said new director's involvement. And to put it off this way, this reboot was only made so the franchise wouldn't be considered "dead."
  3. The only thing this film wants to focus on is the R-rating, rather than its story, characters, and as said before, charm and heart. And because of that, it sometimes takes it way too seriously.
    • It is over-reliant on graphic violence, even in the most unnecessary situations. And some of it is really disgusting, such as Grugach ripping a tounge out of a Catholic and eating it, Nimue having her body sewn back up and her moaning and screaming in agony, Hellboy becoming Anung Un Rama which spawns demons from Hell to mutilate innocent people, and the worst it gets is when Baba Yaga eats dead children and there’s even a scene where we get to see the children hanging.
    • Another thing it’s really bad at is swearing. In fact, there is so much swearing in this film that it would be enough for a South ParkBTSW episode. Every time they drop "fuck" or "shit", they have to say it boldly just so they can tell the audience "Hey, we're R-rated! This isn't for those who are young!" There are 3 characters who are absolutely dreadful when it comes to swearing: Alice, Professor Bruttenholm, and especially Grugach.
      • Not to mention, even the first line in the movie has an f-bomb in it.
    • Ironically, it managed to get final trailer only to just say "Hellboy is rated R" and explains why it is.
  4. David Harbour was never a good Hellboy.
    • Pretty much the only reason why he was chosen to play Hellboy was because Mike Mignola watched Stranger Things and that David actually had questions about Hellboy, and what better way to answer his questions than to cast him. Yes, they hired a man who had no idea what he was doing or even knew what Hellboy is, which is a huge "no-no" when it came to casting.
    • Hellboy’s character development was also butchered because of this. In the originals, Hellboy was cocky, but had a heart, and was loyal to everyone one around him, but here, Hellboy is a massive bully, rudely insulting his own father for his secret, making fun of South Korean people by calling Ben Daimio "uglier than a monster", and even raids a club and murders innocent people, despite him saying that he’s on the good side in the originals.
    • His makeup is hideous, ugly, disturbing, and creepy to look at due to him looking much older than him (weirdly, Ron Perlman is older than him yet looks younger than he does in the reboot), and even having long hair and a goatee. Not only that, but he looks more disturbing than pretty much any monster on here!
    • David Harbour was literally too fat to even play as Hellboy, so to win the role, he did some exercise. So basically, not only did he just get casted automatically, but he wasn’t even ready for the role.
  5. Mediocre acting that is ruined by swearing, miscasts, and much more, mainly because because everyone tries too hard to sound like what you would see in the original films, but it doesn't work, especially when you have to hear Milla Jovovich’s overly dramatic acting as Nimue.
  6. Other than treating Del Toro unfairly and cancelling Hellboy III for this, Mike Mignola did nothing else to the reboot, which explains everything wrong with it.
  7. This film contains massive plot holes, including but not limited to:
    • Hellboy fights a BPRD member who is a vampire, but why would the BPRD member be a wrestler? How did he even become a vampire, and plus, how did he even know Hellboy?
    • How can just only one simple jaguar attack make Ben Daimio a were-jaguar?
    • Grugach randomly gets bigger in the final fight between him and Hellboy, and to quote Alice, "How did he get so fucking big?"
  8. It ruined the origin. Rasputin dies by a burn, despite suffering worse in the original, and Professor Bruttenholm actually "originally" planned to kill Hellboy, but for some sudden change, he adopts him. Also, there is some unexplained Nazi hunter running around during the origin.
  9. This film steals a lot of elements from the Marvel Cinematic UniverseGMW.
    • Nimue's plague causes people to have locusts fly off of people's skin, which more looks like the dust coming off of people's bodies from Avengers: Infinity WarGMW and EndgameGMW.
    • Nimue is very similar to Malekith from Thor: The Dark World, as both of them are just the same villains who come from a different age to destroy the modern-day world. What's weird is that both of them also have the same flaws, such as being generic, dull, flat, and one-dimensional.
    • Some of the posters recycle Avengers: Infinity War and Endgame, too.
    • Grugach getting more bigger and more powerful is basically just the same thing as Algrim The Kursed in Thor: The Dark World.
  10. Mediocre CGI and special effects that look like something straight out of the original 2004 film (due to its CGI not aging well). For instance, the blood splatting everywhere looks too thick and looks more like someone using ketchup for blood.
  11. The advertisements and marketing basically doomed the film already, which is probably why the film flopped.
    • Many of the posters spoiled the presence of Anung Un Rama, something that is definitely not worthy to advertise, only to make the film seem "cool" with the biggest offender being the one with the tagline "Legendary AF", in which AF stands for "as fuck."
    • David Harbour was basically why the marketing was ridiculous. He once told everyone that if he gained 666 thousand followers, he’d do a hell-infested wedding with his new wife. However, the final straw was when David told everyone "Hellboy can’t have sex because he’s a demon" out of absolutely nowhere. Not only that, but it leads to Liz's pregnancy in The Golden Army being a literal mystery, and even then, David has no right to say it, because Hellboy is not his character. Plus, the claim can lead the film being trashed by Social Justice Warriors all because of it.
  12. Very poor grasp of the source material:
    • Ben Daimio was not a were-jaguar, but rather a beast only made out of flesh and bones.
    • The film's major changes of the tone.
    • Hellboy can literally roar like a lion as Anung Un Rama.
    • Also, Hellboy’s favorite "hero" is Lobster Johnson.
    • Hellboy and Professor Bruttenholm can't get along, despite being loyal to each other in the original film.
  13. Milla Jovovich refused to handle any criticism after the film bombed, as she blamed her critics for giving all her films negative reviews (which she is wrong, because most of them have actually been given mixed to positive reviews, especially Zoolander, a film she listed), and going as far as to call this film "good" and "an instant cult classic." She also stated three reasons which had absolutely nothing to do with the film (which were the actors, the director, and Mike Mignola, and that’s it).
    • David Harbour wasn’t any better, as he basically slapped the fans in the face by telling them that due to there being too many complaints, that this film wasn’t going to work out, which is disguised as saying that this film isn’t for the fans.
    • Lionsgate themselves couldn’t accept criticism, either, as they took down Angry Joe’s reaction video to the first trailer, a couple of days after the release, which outraged fans and caused them to call out the company for "bullying content creators." The video was eventually put back up.
  14. The soundtrack overuses heavy metal, which feels incredibly out of place in a Hellboy-based film, and some of these songs are absolutely dreadful, like "Mony Mony" by Billy Idol (of which was even used in the first trailer).
  15. This film also has a complete lack of knowledge, since it thinks that there is a different King Arthur and that Hellboy is literally the devil himself.
  16. Getting rid of Liz Sherman, alongside Abe Sapien (whom they only revealed later on at the end for sequel-baiting) was an absolutely stupid and pointless move, mainly because Alice and Ben are the same characters, but with minor differences.
  17. After Bruttenholm’s secret is revealed, Bruttenholm tries to sugarcoat the entire thing for absolutely no reason at all. It’s like he doesn’t know that his son knows his secret and tries to cover up the entire thing.
  18. Loads of filler, like Grugach as a baby, Baba Yaga eating with Hellboy, and much more.
  19. Possibly the most ridiculous death scene of the film is when Professor Bruttenholm dies by a poke. And the only way is that Nimue goes deep into her skin with her finger to do that. His death in the original movie is way more graphic and actually depressing, and said original movie is only PG-13 rated, which is no excuse for what happens here.

Reception

At release, Hellboy was critically panned by critics, audiences, and fans of the original, with a 17% critic score and 51% audience score, a 5.2 on IMDb, and a 31 on Metacritic. The responses the crew members only made the scores much worse, and the film didn’t even make its budget back, with only $44.6 million out of a 50 million budget. A sequel was actually planned, but was cancelled due to this, killing the franchise effectively.

Trivia

  • If you buy the movie for 4K, you can get a steelbook, along with a free copy of a comic book that the movie was based on.
  • Ed Skrein, known for roles like Ajax in DeadpoolGMW was originally planned to star as Ben Daimio, but stepped down and was recast due to backlash over whitewashing.
  • Brawlhalla made a DLC featuring Hellboy, Nimue, Ben Daimio, and Grugach to promote this movie.

Videos

Gallery

Comments


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That One Stickman

8 months ago
Score 7
This, along with the Sonic Movie, are part of the reason why I want to see UglyDolls.
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No Face

8 months ago
Score 2
I might see UglyDolls just to laugh at how bad it is.
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Eaglebee2356

4 months ago
Score 1
This will make me watch Godzilla 98
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Eaglebee2356

4 months ago
Score 2
Can I have a bruh moment
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JDM4678

3 months ago
Score 1
This makes me want to atleast watch playmobil the movie to see how bad it is
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Just Wage

5 months ago
Score 4

R.I.P. Any plans of this becoming a franchise.

I hope this movie rots in movie hell where all shit movies that flopped go to suffer.
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Just Wage

5 months ago
Score 4

This movie should also get snapped by Moxos.

Moxos.png
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Dreadblocks

4 months ago
Score -4
ENOUGH WITH YOUR STUPID MOXOS!
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 0
And you got snapped out of here by Moxos. LMAO
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2
Fuck you, Knowyourmemeboi.
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -4
Hell As In HellBoy. This. Movie Doesn’t Need to Go To Hell because It already Is.
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Just Wage

5 months ago
Score 3
Remember Eiljtheawesome, you lost by forgetting to add this to GMW.
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Se

5 months ago
Score 1
Um, wrong edit?
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Just Wage

5 months ago
Score 0
You know, I'm not mad because it's R-rated. I'm mad because of the way they f*cked their chance of being a good R-rated reboot.
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -3
Gore
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Just Wage

5 months ago
Score 0
This movie ain't unbreakable. B)
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DJ2006

4 months ago
Score 4

Milla Jovovich: hEcKbOi 2019 Is A rAd FiLm AnD WiLl BeCoMe A cUlT ClAsSiC.

Sticky: So Hellboy eating Pizza like that will become a "cult classic"?

Me: Her and that new Heckboi film should be snapped by Kongos

Sticky: Ya mean Moxos?

Me: Ya mean Kongos?
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2

Me: No Y O U M E A N M O X O S ! ?

Moxos.png
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DJ2006

4 months ago
Score 2

Kongos: (Snaps Heckboi 2019 out of existence) Moxos: NOOOOOO!!! MY OPPOTUNITY TO SNAP!!!

Kongos: Snap time!
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -3
HellBoy is More Like Fuckboy
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2

iT'S AlwAys STrEssFUl On OpEninG weeKEnD AnD @hEllbOYmOvIE Is nO dIFFERent. yOU Work supEr harD tO MAKE SOMEThiNg Fun anD enteRtaInInG AnD hAve to aBSORb THe negaTivE rEVieWS by MoVIe CRITicS, But HEy! That'S shOWBiz Baby. aLl i'M gONnA saY BeForE going To BeD IS this: all My rADdeSt FiLms hAVe bEeN SLaMmed By crITiCS. iT's FUCking HIlARiouS. dazed AnD coNfusED? sEriOUslY? CLassic movie. The fifTh eleMEnT! yOu WOuLD HAVe ThouGHt that WaS THe WOrst MOVIe EVER maDE if yOU REad ThE ReViEWs iN Like '98. zOoLanDer? SLAmMED. joaN of Arc? dIsASter. REsidEnt eVIl? LeT's NOt EvEn GO tHerE. aNywAY, EVeRy ONE of ThoSe fiLMS IS nOw A culT CLasSic. EVeRy. siNgLe. onE. And this wiLl be toO. MARk MY wOrdS. why? 1. bECause Of the AMaZINg aCtOrs. dAVid HaRBOUR. iaN mCSHAnE. daNiEl dAE KIm. SASHa LAne. THEy aRe alL SO daMN wOnDeRfuL And TalenTED, thE MovIe iS WOrTH sEEIng juSt BecAuSe ThEY'Re iN iT, ESpEciaLLy oNE THaT'S so MuCh fUn tO ExpErIenCE AS THIs Is. 2. @mIKEmiGnOla WHO CrEaTEd thE #HellbOY ComICs heLPeD Write the ScRipt And was oN SEt EVery SInGLE dAy TO mAKe ThIS fIlM AS CLosE TO His Vision aS POsSIBLe. 3. IT was diReCTED bY ONe Of the gREATs. #NEIlmARshALl WHo bROugHt Us "ThE dEScEnT". One of The GrEATEST hoRROR MovIes EvEr. tRUst Me, yOU're gOnNA HaVe a blAst wAtCHiNG ThE NEw @hellBOyMovie. I MEan, one cRItIC sAID "it's a lOUd, gOry MESS oNLY a teenAger WOULD LOvE." HEll YeA hELLBOY! Let's hAVE sOmE fun! aNd wITH ThAt, i Wish You aLl a gooD nIGhT!


What a slut.
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No Face

4 months ago
Score 2
Me: Girl, you need to shut yer trap.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 4
Susence.jpg
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No Face

4 months ago
Score 2
I really need to scream this Instagram post.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2

YES!!! SCREAM THE FUCKING INSTAGRAM POST!!! And have this as your background!

Millagetsdunked.png
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No Face

4 months ago
Score 3

I screamed it lol.

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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -4
LMAO
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 3

Look! It's shit!

Shitreviewonhellboy.png

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No Face

4 months ago
Score 5
Breathin.jpeg
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -1
Lol
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -1
wow Shit!1!1!1!1!
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 5

Me when I found out Hellboy eats pizza in this movie like a slob.

Fatdorkeatingpizza.jpg

Ugly-Dog.gif
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No Face

4 months ago
Score 2
Oh god, that's way too big.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2
I wish this film got a 1% rotten rating instead of a 17%. Batman v. Superman would get a 0%, BTW.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
F O C K I T! O P E N I T!
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -2
It’s Actually Like This:F U C K I N G O P E N I T
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EnnardTrap1987

4 months ago
Score 2
Hellboy’s face needs to become an Internet meme for how ugly he looks..
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
He looks like a poop emoji.
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -3
What the fuck?
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No Face

4 months ago
Score 2
Sticky, how the hell (no pun intended) were you able to see this movie, if you did? You're like 15 or 14.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
Pirating. :)
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2
Nowadays. I've already seen both trailers to know what the movie's about and how it's gonna suck (which it did) so I made all the WIS reasons based off of my experiences of the trailers.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
Let's start a campaign against this movie. Let's call it "Ripped Off Before, Never Again" due to its lying posters.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
Hellboy only has horns for money.
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -2
Money Horns
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2
Replace every rock song in this movie with Eijitheawesome's screaming lyrics.
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Ramadhan1a

3 months ago
Score 2
Why don't Eiji screams all of the rock songs in that movie instead?
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1
When you watch this, you gain brain cancer. To cure your brain cancer, watch your favorite movie.
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SpazJR61

4 months ago
Score 2

What a f**k is that comments section.

Also I like your profile photo.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 1

When Hellboy roars like a lion in this movie.


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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 3

How many shrimps do you have to eat? before you make your skin turn pink eat too much and you'll get sick shrimps are pretty rich

THISISGETTINHOT.gif
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JDM4678

4 months ago
Score 3

What movie is worse?

MIB international?

OR

This
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 2
This.
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Just Wage

4 months ago
Score 3

That one Hellboy scene in a nutshell.

Nimue: Hi it is i nimue i want hellboy

Hellboy: I'm gonna kill you cuz you killed bprd

Nimue: No but i want you to be evil now pull the sword

Hellboy: No

Nimue: I got yo father bitch

Professor Bruttenholm: Son please hunt her down do the best you can

*gets poked at by nimue and dies*

Professor Bruttenholm: I know you wont let me down...blech

Hellboy: Duh i'm gonna turn evil cuz i hate my father

Hellboy (evil): ROOOOOOAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!! I'M FUCKING EVIL ANUNG UN RAMA!!!!!!!!!! ROOOOOOOOAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!1

I hate this movie so much.
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Knowyourmemeboi

3 months ago
Score -1
Y e s
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Ramadhan1a

4 months ago
Score 4
Hollywood just need to stop remaking or rebooting old properties by now.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 1
I hate David Harbour so much I want to beat his...big...massive...RED body!
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No Face

3 months ago
Score 3
Listen Knowyourmemeboi, stop trash talking Sticky over his comments.
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Ramadhan1a

3 months ago
Score 2

sHuT ThE fuCK up, nObOdY FuCkinG CaRES

No u shut up idiot.
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Stephenfisher2001

3 months ago
Score 1
And Shut the Heck up!
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Hayden B.

3 months ago
Score 2
If Orion Pictures can do a good job rebooting Child's Play, why can't the same be said for freaking HELLBOY???
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 1
Because Lionsgate
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Dreadblocks

3 months ago
Score -1
WAIT WHAAAT!!!!aren't these the same people who made Max Steel (2016).
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 0
What the actual fuck are you talking about?
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FreezingTNT

3 months ago
Score 1
@Hayden B. Because they have different screenwriters.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 1
he'S aN ASshoLE
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 4
Upvote the comment if you hate this movie.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score -2
Downvote the reply I made if you like this movie.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 3

When someone says the Hellboy reboot is better than the originals

Bruhwhatisthis.png
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Knowyourmemeboi

2 months ago
Score 0
Ok
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 1

R.I.P. Hellboy

Murdered by David Harbour
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Hayden B.

3 months ago
Score 1
The only hope we have left is if Hellboy 3 is going to being developed (kinda like Ghostbusters) by (hopefully) another studio. Fingers crossed.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 1
Unfortunately, del Toro claimed that Hellboy 3 will never be made. So yeah, it's dead.
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Just Wage

3 months ago
Score 0

I rather watch Cans Without Labels anyday than this. George Liquoros for the win.

George Liquros American.jpg
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0
Who wants to boycott Stranger Things 4 after seeing this?
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0
TotallyUnnecessary.jpg
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0

Deleted ending:

The tank that UglyBoy, Alice, and Ben found was actually Hellhound and they all wasn't able to defeat him, so they were beaten up (they didn't die, for sequel baiting).

Hellhound.png
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DJ2006

2 months ago
Score 1

I can do it a bit better:

When Heckboi, Alice and Ben found Hellhound, Roobarb popped up out of nowhere and helped Hellhound defeat the trio and have them snapped out of existence. Then Roobarb goes back home and finds Milla Jovovich outside the door and tells her she starred in a movie that his pal ThatOneStickman13 hates with a burning passion, but Milla says exactly what she said in her Instagram post, but then he snaps her out of existence.

Later, Roobarb goes into his shed and builds a time machine. He uses it to snap David Harbour so he won't star in Heckboi 20andflippin19.
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EnnardTrap1987

2 months ago
Score 1
Hellboy’s face is the only redeeming quality. Nah jk, his face made the movie even worse.
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0
IKR
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0

iT's Just a HUmaN ChiLd

B I T C H W H Y D I D Y O U S H O W M E F U C K I N G D E A D C H I L D R E N
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Knowyourmemeboi

2 months ago
Score 1
-H A N G I N G O N S C R E E N (just finishing it)
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KaiSmithMiraheze

2 months ago
Score 1
That's not my friendly neighbourhood Baba Yaga I know and love. I'm telling ya,she had reformed long time ago and now eats nothing but honey toasts and milk.
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 1
lol
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Knowyourmemeboi

2 months ago
Score 1
XD
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Hayden B.

2 months ago
Score 1
Not only does the plague scene ripoff Infinity War/ Endgame, one of the posters for this shit is literally a spoof of Infinity War's poster. Let THAT sink in.
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 1
Oof.
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FreezingTNT

2 months ago
Score 0
@Hayden B. Can you send me an image of the Hellboy poster that rips off the one for Infinity War?
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Dreadblocks

2 months ago
Score 0
WageTheUglyDoll12 why is there a Picture of Hellboy Eating Pizza?
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0
To demonstrate the film's "cult-classic status"
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Just Wage

2 months ago
Score 0

It was time for Thomas to leave.


He had seen everything.
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Dreadblocks

one month ago
Score 1

We should have a contest, which do you think is worse, this or Max Steel (2016). If Hellboy (2019) wins that means Wage wins.

If Max Steel (2016) wins that means i win.
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Dreadblocks

18 days ago
Score 1
Basically critically i win Because Max Steel (2016) has a 0% rating, while Hellboy (2019) has a 17%, but which do you think is worse.
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Maxkatzur

one month ago
Score 1
Hellboy? More like Failboy, because this movie fails SO HARD.
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Just Wage

17 days ago
Score 0
More like Fatboy.
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EnnardTrap1987

25 days ago
Score 2
I hate how we got THIS over Hellboy 3..
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Demon Horse

17 days ago
Score 1
I enjoyed this movie.
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Just Wage

17 days ago
Score 0
Ok
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Just Wage

10 days ago
Score 0
LA2002, don't ever bother touching this page again.
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Just Wage

9 days ago
Score 0
Also LA2002: Lel i'M toO SENsITIve so ImmA MaKE thE dEAd cHiLdREN paRt reD teXT AND BiG loloLOLOLOlol
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Just Wage

9 days ago
Score 0

The nominations will be revealed in 6 days. I will have my lucky UglyDoll to hope this gets nominated and wins Worst Picture. Screw Loqueesha!

Moxos.png

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