Disaster Movie

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Disaster Movie
IMG 2050.JPG
It really was a disaster.
Genre: Parody
Comedy
Directed By: Jason Friedberg
Aaron Seltzer
Written By: Jason Friedberg
Aaron Seltzer
Starring: Matt Lanter
Vanessa Minnillo
Gary "G Thang" Johnson
Crista Flanagan
Nicole Parker
Ike Barinholtz
Kim Kardashian-West
Carmen Electra
Tony Cox
Distributed By: Lionsgate
Release Date: August 29, 2008
Runtime: 87 minutes (PG-13 version)
88 minutes (Cataclysmic Edition)
Country: United States
Prequel: Meet the Spartans
Sequel: Vampires Suck


Disaster Movie is a 2008 American parody comedy film written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, starring Matt Lanter, Vanessa Lachey (née Minnillo), Gary "G Thang" Johnson, Crista Flanagan, Ike Barinholtz, and Kim Kardashian-West. The film is a parody of the disaster film genre and popular culture, and released on August 29, 2008 by Lionsgate.

Upon release, it received negative reception, with a 1% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, a 1.9/10 on IMDb and a 15% on Metacritic; it is also considered as the worst film made by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, as well one of, if not the the worst film(s) of all time.

Plot

"During a fateful night, a group of impossibly attractive 20-somethings (Matt Lanter, Vanessa Minnillo, Kim Kardashian) must dodge a series of man-made and natural disasters. Twisters, asteroids, earthquakes and singer Amy Winehouse are just some of the perils they face while trying to make their way to safety."

Official description

The film begins in 10,001 B.C., a caveman is seen running away from a mammoth, which squashes him, and the caveman gets his face covered in mammoth dung. He keeps running until he encounters Wolf and gets into a fight with him. He manages to defeat him, sees a reptilian-like creature's eye, and starts to run away. The creature then turns out to be a gasoline-drinking sabre-toothed Amy Winehouse. She takes her MacBook, goes to "Facenook," and informs him that on August 29, 2008, the world will end, and their fate lies on the Crystal Skull (which is amber-covered). The caveman starts to scream.

The sequence turns out to be a nightmare that Will was having as we cut to the present. Will wakes up and is sleeping with his girlfriend Amy, who turns out to be having an affair with Flavor Flav. She takes with Jo-Jo with her after Will fails to admit his true feelings for her, and she states he will not go to the "Super Duper Sweet Sixteen" birthday party at his house because he is twenty-five. He responds by saying that he never had one before she leaves. At Will's "Super Duper Sweet Sixteen" birthday party, we meet a girl who flashes her hairy breasts to Will, Dr. Phil, Will's best friend Calvin, Anton Chigurgh, and Calvin's girlfriend, Lisa Taylor. Seth and "McLover" then try to steal beers, while Lisa wrestles with The Beautiful Assassin. After a long fight, she hires Calvin to shoot the assassin, but he accidentally shoots at Dr. Phil, scaring Seth and McLover. He tries to shoot at her again, but accidentally shoots at Chigurgh instead, frightening Seth and McLover. The assassin says that she curved the bullet, and Calvin finally shoots at her, causing Seth and McLover to leave the party.

Meanwhile, Juney and Paulie are talking about selling babies on "uPay", and Amy arrives with her new boyfriend, a Calvin Klein underwear model. After the High School Musical kids, Jessica Simpson and J.T. sing, the room shakes and the lights go out. A bulletin from the radio reports that something has jolted the city; this scares the underwear model, who immediately assumes he and the others are going to die. Will asks Amy why she brought another guy with her, and she responds by saying that every time he made love, she was thinking about another guy. The bulletin reports that there is a meteor shower that is going to end the world, with one of them having destroyed a Pinkberry; in response to this, everyone evacuates. As everyone is running away, Will, Calvin, Lisa and Juney discover that a meteor has hit Hannah Montana, who awakens, saying goodbye to all her fans before fainting. After awakening for the fifth time, her blonde wig falls out, revealing her identity as Miley Cyrus. A child tries to wake up a drunken Hancock to save the world, but the latter slaps him, sending him flying as he calls him out as an asshole.

He wakes up and gets hit in the head by a pole, passing out. The city starts to freeze over, and they retreat to a garage for shelter, where they meet characters from Sex and the City. Juney fights and defeats Carrie Bradshaw; she explains that global warming caused the calamities, and Will realizes that the dream he had about Amy Winehouse could be related to so.

In a dream, Will is a Jumper and he informs Amy of his abilities to teleport through time to space. Prince Caspian comes in and says, "I am Prince Caspian, here to save Narnia," as Will falls into his sword; he identifies Will as "the guy who ruined Star Wars" (referring to Hayden Christensen). Will screams upon awakening from the nightmare, and his friends inform him that they had seen his dream, scolding him for not committing himself to his relationship with Amy; the room starts shaking, so they evacuate from the garage. One police officer encourages others to continue moving as many of them are being hit by meteors. Will gets a call from Amy, who is currently in a museum, standing next to the skeleton of a Tyrannosaurus rex. He admits his love for her; however, he is unable to hear her while she is talking as the call is dropped, and she leaves. He decides to go and rescue her, but Calvin urges him not to, fearing his safety. Lisa is hit by a meteor, ending her life in the process. While the others comfort Calvin, the Enchanted Princess climbs out only for a taxicab to run her over. Calvin immediately falls in love with the Enchanted Princess, who informs the group of her consumption of enchanting drugs. Time passes, and the princess' pimp, Prince Edwin, comes in and challenges Calvin in a dance fight.

A tornado appears and Edwin flees and hides in the sewer hole, informing Calvin that the Enchanted Princess is all his. Iron Man comes to fight the natural disaster and introduces himself, before being hit by a cow thrown by said tornado, essentially turning him into a tin can. Hellboy arrives only to be hit by another cow thrown by the tornado, encouraging him to leave. Bruce Banner, enraged by the tornado, transforms into the Hulk; his pants rip, and is hit by yet another cow thrown by the tornado. Amy informs Will on the phone that an Egyptian statue had fallen on her during the earthquake; Will informs her of his intentions to rescue her, but she is unable to hear him. They find shelter, and Calvin gets a phone call on his shoe phone from Lisa's mother; he informs her about the demise of her daughter and explains how he has found the Enchanted Princess. After the call, Calvin ends up with dog poop on his face. The group encounter three chipmunks singing and dancing to death metal music; it turns out they have rabies and they begin to attack the gang, feeding on Juney's back until she seems to die, and Will and Calvin manage to trap the chipmunks in a garbage can, in which they suffocate to death.

After a parody of the infamous "HeadOn" commercial is shown, the group head outside where many civilians are evacuating, including Batman, who informs them of their requirement to leave in buses and how there would be no chance of survival if they head to rescue Amy. Learning that 5:30 PM is closer to 9:00 PM than he thought, he throws a grappling hook, which then accidentally lands on a car that drags him away as he was in the middle of a conversation with the Enchanted Princess. With time running out, the Enchanted Princess shoots several times at Speed Racer, allowing the group hijack his Mach Five. Upon hearing someone say "Hee-hee!", the group open the trunk of the vehicle to discover Michael Jackson, Chim-Chim and Spritle inside.

The group head to the Natural History Museum and rescue Amy, who informs them that the Crystal Skull from the nightmare Will had is the only thing that can prevent the end of the world. Calvin and the princess attempt to escape when the doors for the museum are closed, as the artifacts come to life. Running to place the Crystal Skull onto the altar, Will and Amy encounter a nude Beowulf, who continuously introduces himself as Will makes gay jokes about him.

Calvin and the Enchanted Princess confront Kung Fu Panda, who slaps the Enchanted Princess; Calvin engages in a fight, defeats him in the process. Calvin and the Enchanted Princess kiss only for the former to accidentally pull out her wig, revealing her identity as a man in drag. Taking out a katana, Kung Fu Panda kills both of them. As Will is in the middle of a fight with Beowulf, Amy takes an axe and impales Beowulf in the back, killing him.

Will and Amy run to the altar only to meet his father, Indiana Jones; he tries to place the Crystal Skull onto the altar but has an accident. Will places the Crystal Skull on the altar instead, succeeding as everything returns to normal. The film ends with Will and Amy ending up being married as "The Guru Shitka" is performed. An extensive musical number about some of the characters dating each other, ending with the Chipmunks, all three of whom are crushed by a cow as the film ends.

Why It Sucks

  1. It's filled to the brim with gross-out jokes and other forms of toilet humor, racist jokes, homophobic jokes, transphobic jokes, and sex jokes. An example is the Amy Winehouse parody burping and not stopping for a very long time (it's even longer in the Unrated Cut).
  2. Speaking of which, the unrated cut of the film, known as the "Cataclysmic Edition," is just as bad as the original cut, if not, possibly worse. It just has more rear nudity, sex references, unfunny jokes, and swearing (there are at least 50 F-bombs in the unrated edition).
  3. Multiple out-of-place cameos, especially from Michael Jackson (a year before his death), Justin Timberlake, or any other celebrity that was popular back in 2008.
  4. The awful acting can ruin a somewhat funny scene, especially from Kim Kardashian.
  5. Terrible and unlikable characters. First, Will is a bland and uninteresting action hero. Second, his girlfriend, Amy, is a generic forced romantic interest. Third, Calvin is a token African American guy who is irritatingly unfunny, always saying perverted stuff, and behaves uncomfortably and passive-aggressively. Lastly, Juney (a parody of Juno MacGuff) is an annoying character because she only speaks in teenage hipster lingo.
  6. Airplane! already did the film's concept decades earlier and way better.
  7. The setting has no dark atmosphere to the end of the world, and it looks fake, much like Friedberg and Seltzer's other movies.
  8. The story is horrendous, and the film isn't invested with its world's end plotline and wants to shoehorn sketches that have nothing to do with the apocalypse, such as the "dance battle" scene.
  9. The pacing is horrific and sluggish. Despite the film being only 87 minutes long, some of the scenes feel like they drag on for a very long time. The longest the film can go without making a new reference is 4 minutes and 20 seconds!
  10. The humour is minimal, merely being based on popular films of 2007 or 2008 and toilet humour.
  11. Several continuity errors. For example, in one scene, Amy gets a facial cut, but in the next scene, it disappears with no explanation.
  12. Too many pop-culture references. In one scene where Juney and Paulie are talking, they referred both Facebook and eBay by their actual names, but on-screen, the parody names are shown (Facenook and uPay).
  13. It has some foolish ideas including rabid and monstrous chipmunks who are parodies of Alvin and the Chipmunks and an evil Kung Fu Panda (a parody of Po from Kung Fu Panda).
  14. Speaking of Alvin and Chipmunks and Kung Fu Panda, their costumes or puppets are horrible and hideous to look at, especially the Kung Fu Panda costume, which has horrendous lip-syncing.
  15. Considering the title of the movie, one would assume that it would knock on Hollywood disaster films where it conjures virtually every conceivable threat except for droughts (though that's a drama situation). The only "disaster" movie mentioned is 1996's Twister and the cliché "cow in tornado" bit.
    • Fun fact: In Brazil, the film's title is Super-Heróis: A Liga da Injustiça (Portuguese for "Super Heroes: The Injustice League"), even though the film is supposed to be a "parody" of the disaster film genre, not the superhero genre.
    • And to make matters worse, some of the parodied movies, like Hancock, Wanted, The Dark Knight, Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk and Kung Fu Panda, had not been released when the writers were writing the film's script.
  16. The film's parody of Disney's Enchanted was completely useless because Enchanted was already a parody itself; it mocks the animated fairy tale movies that Disney used to produce.
  17. The Austin Powers parody was also completely useless as Austin Powers itself was already a parody movie; it mocks the James Bond series.
  18. Abysmal songs, including one about getting an abortion and another one about how dating is sex. The "I'm Dating" (or "I'm F***ing") song is a total rip off of the "I'm F***ing Matt Damon" comedy song by Sarah Silverman. During the song, the "Beautiful Assassin" (a parody of Fox from Wanted) refers to Anton Chigurh from No Country for Old Men "as the Mexican," even though the character is most likely European while the actor Javier Bardem is from Spain, not Mexico.
    • What makes things worse is that this film is not supposed to be a musical!
  19. The original music score by Christopher Lennertz is very bland. When the score is trying to support the apocalyptic setting, it doesn't even have that over-theatrical and melodramatic orchestral style that Hollywood disaster films have.
  20. Poor special effects. For example, when the Enchanted Princess is shooting Speed Racer repeatedly with a pistol, you can see that the slide on her pistol doesn't move.
  21. The film's Japanese poster is misleading since it shows a Tyrannosaurus skeleton grabbing Carrie Bradshaw, even though it doesn't appear in the movie whatsoever and even though the T. rex had 3-foot (1 meter) long forelimbs with only two fingers. The American poster is misleading too, as it shows the Mack Five from Speed Racer in a tornado, but that never happens in the movie.
  22. Awful ending. As mentioned in the plot, some of the characters sing about dating (f***ing in the Unrated Cut).
  23. Poor audio editing. During the "I'm Dating" song, Batman's guitar begins to play before the shot switches over to Batman.
  24. Some of the movies, like Alvin and the Chipmunks (live-action series) and The Love Guru, are already terrible movies. What made them think that parodying horrible movies would make this one good?
  25. The costumes for Batman and Iron Man aren't good and look like cheap Halloween costumes. Iron Man looks more "Plastic Man," and Batman's costume has wonky ears for no apparent reason. Has he been in a fight or something?
  26. Idiotic, unrealistic, and sometimes vulgar names, like "The Guru Shitka."
  27. Blatant product placement for Calvin Klein and Apple.

Redeeming Qualities

  1. Some of the costumes are pretty good, like the Enchanted Princess (Giselle) costume, in which looks good but doesn't look that close to the actual movie. in which Giselle in the actual wore an white wedding gown with bridal gauntlets, here in the movie, She wears an blue gown with gloves as the same color as her gown. with the costumes for the Sex and the City girls, and Ike Barinholtz does a decent performance as a parody Hellboy.
  2. The "HeadOn" joke is pretty funny.
  3. "Friends Forever" is pretty catchy, despite the bad lyrics.
  4. Since the film received disastrous reviews; we can at least say it lives up to its title.
    • At least it lives up to it's name, "Disaster Movie", because it is a disaster of a movie.

Parodies

Movies & TV Shows

  • 10,000 BC (2008)
  • American Gladiators (2008)
  • Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
  • Flavor of Love (2006-2008)
  • My Super Sweet 16 (2005-2008)
  • SuperbadGMW (2007)
  • Wanted (2008)
  • ​No Country for Old Men (2007)
  • Juno (2007)
  • High School Musical (2006)
  • Cloverfield (2008)
  • The Day After TomorrowGMW (2004)
  • Hannah Montana (2006-2011)
  • Hancock (2008)
  • Sex and the City (1998-2004)
  • Sex and the City (2008)
  • You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)
  • Jumper (2008)
  • The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (2008)
  • Enchanted (2007)
  • Step Up 2: The Streets (2008)
  • TwisterGMW (1996)
  • Iron ManGMW (2008)
  • HellboyGMW (2004)
  • The Incredible HulkGMW
  • Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
  • Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)
  • The Shining (1980)
  • HeadOn (2006 commercial)
  • The Dark Knight (2008)
  • Speed Racer (2008)
  • Night at the Museum (2006)
  • Beowulf (2007)
  • Kung Fu PandaGMW (2008)
  • The Love Guru (2008)

Real-Life People

  • Amy Winehouse
  • Justin Timberlake
  • Jessica Simpson
  • Phil McGraw
  • Michael Jackson

Reception

Box office

The film grossed over $34.8 million against a budget of $20 million. Making it a box office bomb and the first unsuccessful film from Friedberg and Seltzer.

Critical response

Critics and moviegoers alike panned the film when it came out, for its forced humor, excessive pop culture references and poor directing, with many considering it to be worse than the previous movies created by Seltzer and Friedberg. On Rotten Tomatoes, the film has a 1% approval rating based on 73 reviews with an average rating of 1.8/10. The site's critical consensus says "Returning to their seemingly bottomless well of flatulence humor, racial stereotypes, and stale pop culture gags, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer have produced what is arguably their worst movie yet.". The movie also has a 1.9/10 on IMDb, and, as of October 13, 2018, tops the site's Bottom Rated Movies list. It also has a 15% on Metacritic based on 12 critics and an F from Cinemascore.

Awards

The film got nominated for six Razzie Awards (Worst Picture for Friedberg and Seltzer, Worst Supporting Actress for Electra, Worst Supporting Actress for Kardashian, Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-off or Sequel, Worst Director for Friedberg and Seltzer, and Worst Screenplay for Friedberg and Seltzer). Still, all lost to The Love Guru, Repo! The Genetic Opera, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, 1968 Tunnel Rats, In the Name of the King, and Postal. It, however, won a Golden Schmoes Awards for Worst Movie.

Videos

External Links

Comments


avatar

ItMeansNothing

16 months ago
Score 4

What REALLY impresses me is that Lionsgate can handle a parody version of Hellboy, but can't handle the main one by fucking it up and hiring a COMEDIAN ACTOR to hire the main role.


👏👏Congrats Hollywood!👏👏
avatar

Chang

12 months ago
Score 1
Hellboy didn't even deserve a reboot. They should have continued with Guillermo del Toro's original version.
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EnnardTrap1987

14 months ago
Score 2

It really lives up to its name.

Its a disaster.
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Blossom.Alyssa

13 months ago
Score 0
I would much rather jump off the highest building ever made than witness the painful, terrifying, atrocious experience of Disaster Movie again. I get that it's a parody and it's not meant to be taken seriously, but by God Almighty's son, you had no idea how much I wanted to shoot myself being forced to watch this with my cousins. And—get this—they laughed like fucking HYENAS. I was just... disgusted, humiliated, mutilated, downright RAPED by this movie. Friedberg and Seltzer are drug-induced evildoers who were never, ever considered "directors". Sure, their other "parody" movies were just as horrible, but sweet, heavenly CHRIST this movie. It's an ungodly mess that deserves to be burned in EVERY bonfire if it means I can live a happy life knowing it doesn't exist anymore.
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HammerBro101

11 months ago
Score 1
We should put "The Worst Movie Ever" on Awful Movies Wiki, because the title doesn't lie. It is the worst movie ever, as well as the worst grossing movie of all time.
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MintypuffLove

8 months ago
Score 0
So basically if there was a parody of Enchanted in there, and Enchanted was in there, does that make it a parodied parody?
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NeedsMoreJPEG

8 months ago
Score 0
a better heading: Why it's a Disaster
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TanReviewer

6 months ago
Score 0
I HATE this "disaster!!!"
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Emoboy69

6 months ago
Score 0
This film looks like it's been made by The Asylum!😂😂😂
avatar
I hate Disaster Movie.
avatar

Newjerseyartist

4 months ago
Score 0
I'd rather watch "Plump Fiction" instead of this.
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DatCoolRedstoneGuy Est. 2004

3 months ago
Score 0
This movie is SO bad that even I know it lives up to its title
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Yūki

one month ago
Score 1
I've despised this movie with every being of thy body.
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LancedSoul

one month ago
Score 0
This movie is such a disaster.
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GRAND-DUCHY

21 days ago
Score 2

I used to watch that movie.

I want to forget that movie. That movie must disappear from the galaxies. From eternity... I really want to forget it! Please!!! Biggest mistake in my life!
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Master Chief

21 days ago
Score 2
at least the title is being honest.
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Flasmonix

17 days ago
Score 0
Pop s*** crap movie
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Yūki

3 hours 24 minutes ago
Score 0
Unpopular opinion: This movie is much worse than Cuties and The Emoji Movie combined.

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