Blog:EarthBound: The Movie! (Fake)

EarthBound: The Movie! (known as the Ultimate Mother 2 experience in Japan) Is a Multinational 2022 animated/CGI American-British-Japanese-Thai Film that was released on May 5, 2022. It is based on the 1995 Super Nintendo game of the same name.

Why It Stinks
TBA
 * 1) This Movie turns down everything that made the game so special. The game was rated T on the Nintendo E-shop, due to Giygas, but this Movie is Rated PG so they had to dumb it down to make Family Friendly
 * 2) The characters have suffered from Flanderization:
 * 3) *Ness is now a prick that is now obsessed with committing crimes, he also digs in the trash too much, that he won’t stop eating too much.
 * 4) *Paula is now a K-Pop obsessed freak that complains over the simplest of things.
 * 5) *Jeff is now a greedy freak that steals Tiffany’s cookies for no reason.
 * 6) *Poo is now a Just a piece of crap that does nothing in the Film other than for filler, you could easily take home out and nothing would change!
 * 7) *The new party member, Lillie, was only added as a token Black member so the directors would say that they have a “Diverse” cast.
 * 8) *Giygas is now a Generic “Take over the world because I’m Evil” antagonist whose personality feels too forced.
 * 9) *Ness’s Mom is now a abusive mother that gets angry over the simplest of things. She is also obsessed with her Telenovela.
 * 10) *Tiffany (Tony in the game) is now A crybaby that cries for the entire Movie all because Jeff stole his cookies.
 * 11) *Pokey is now a pervert that looks at fetishes on various websites.
 * 12) Poor grasp of the source material
 * 13) * In the game Tony was probably a LBGTQ Character, but in this Movie, he is a girl named Tiffany.
 * 14) **According to a interview, they had to change Tony’s gender to avoid getting the Movie banned in Russia, China, and Singapore.
 * 15) *Also, Lillie never appeared in the Games
 * 16) *how did the Mother 3 and Mother 1 characters appear in a movie that is supposed to be related to Mother 2?
 * 17) The soundtrack is mediocre at best, but the worst song in the Film is Giyga’s “I’m evil”, which sounds like a song that was added in the last minute.
 * 18) *While the scene of Ness and his friends singing "Dessert" by Hyo featuring Loopy and Soyeon is a wholesome moment, it has nothing to do with EarthBound.
 * 19) There are some filler scenes, such as:
 * 20) * A annoying running gag of Ness’ mom wanting to watch her Telenovela but gets interrupted by various characters.
 * 21) * Ness ordering a lot of junk food at a burger restaurant a la Big Smoke.
 * 22) * Lucas crying over his mom’s death which goes on for 3 minutes until Duster tells him to shut up.
 * 23) * Kumatora ranting about how "Pop Music is Overrated" for 5 minutes.
 * 24) The film can’t decide it’s target audience, it’s rated PG but the game it’s based on is Rated T, the film also has overuse of the words “Crap”, “Hell” and “Damn”.
 * 25) Most of the dialogue is really bad, especially Paula’s infamous “Oh No, oh no, oh no, Oh No!” Line, which was so cringe that it ended up spawning memes because of that.
 * 26) Giygas (while a good scene) has some moments that can scare some kids, which is too tough for a PG rated Movie.
 * 27) *The soundtrack is even worse!
 * 28) Some of the dubs are no better than the actual movie, here are some examples:
 * 29) *In the Brazilian dub, they had to darken some of the scenes, containing PSI powers, which isn’t even that bright, and it never had scenes involving seizures, due to the mh:terribletvshows:Electric Soldier Porygon incident, considering that the Movie is Co-created in Japan.
 * 30) some Inappropriate moments in a PG-Rated movie. Examples include:
 * 31) *Paula doing the Zero Two Dance
 * 32) *Tiffany Looking at Rule 34 of Lamps.
 * 33) *Ness twerking to "Boombayah" by BLACKPINK for the EarthBound Discord server in a kids movie!
 * 34) Product placement that feels out of place in a Film related to EarthBound, Such as Cartoon Network, Nintendo, Disney Plus, Just Dance 2022, Raising Cane’s, Eurovision Song Contest, and the mention of the PBS kids show Odd Squad.
 * 35) Most of the casting choices are questionable. As with the 2022 Super Mario Movie, This is a infamous example of Stunt casting.
 * 36) *Although that voice acting is fine, some of the casting choices, such as Bella Poarch as Paula, feels like it was made to pander to Teens and Gen Z freaks.

Redeeming Qualities
TBA
 * 1) The Animation is passable, since it was animated by Rough Daft studios.
 * 2) Some of the Characters didn’t suffer from flanderization, such as Tracy.
 * 3) The Scene of Ness and his friends singing “Dessert” by Hyo featuring Loopy and Soyeon is wholesome, despite having nothing to do with EarthBound
 * 4) even though, it’s a bad song, Giygas’ “I’m evil” song can be funny (Depending on who you ask) due to the horribly bad acting.

Reception
TBA

Trivia
TBA