Blog:JKL (Fake Director (Dready))

Note: This is a fake director any resemblance to an actual person Will be coincidence! Just don't take this think seriously!

James Kenny Lonesnow (Better known by his nickname JKL) is a Jamaican-born Brittish director, he is infamously known for directing movies featuring random people and Reggae artists, he is known for such critically panned movies like: Asses Underwater, Aliens from planet 666, New hope Bitches and Rastafarian Man

Filmography

 * Screw the pigs (1991)
 * Jerks in the sewers (1992)
 * Asses Underwater (1998)
 * Aliens from PLanet 666 (1999)
 * Path of samurai (2001)
 * Crazy assholes (2002)
 * Bob and the gangsters (2004)
 * New Hope Bitches (2008)
 * Wired to the pussy town (2013)
 * Jar for wimps (2014)
 * Middle is not my name (2018)
 * Rastafarian Man (2020)
 * Home Alone: Child Protective services (2020)
 * Going Under: Dawn of War (2021) (With David Failburg)

Why he and his movies not only suck but are EXTREMELY STUPID!!!!

 * 1) Similar to David Failburg, none of his movies (Except for his Debut: Screw The Pigs) we're screened in advance for critics which……………. You know the fucking thing about it, don't need to tell you again.
 * 2) The ideas for his movies are exteremly STUPID!!!, like underwater butts, aliens with vaginas, cows with tits, monkeys with so many anuses, drunk animals and EVEN FARTING FLYING PIGS WITH DEMON WINGS!!!!
 * 3) His movies feature poor lightning, which make them look more like home videos rather than actual movies.
 * 4) His movies we're made with a very low budget, for example Asses underwater was made with only 100$.
 * 5) So many of his movies feature innapropiate pornographics jokes for example in Rastafarian Man, one scene has Filthy Frank as Pink Guy grabbing Ziggy Marley's BALLS!!!
 * 6) Some of his movies end with a terrible sequel bait, weirdly enough none of his movies even got a sequel, Asinine (that would be called Buttsasin in Australia), was planned to be a sequel to Asses Underwater (called Butts Underwater in  australia) but was cancelled due to the first movies abysmal reception and box Office gross.
 * 7) Terrible animation in some of his movies that look like they we're made with a 5 year old kid.
 * 8) His movies are filled with swearing that makes the dialogue even more laughable than it already is for example, in Butts Underwater there's a scene where King ass says: I'm gonna stick a TNT in you're fucking penis! (thankfully it was censored in australia)
 * 9) Horrible editing and pacing his movies are filled with unnecesary cut out scenes, and terrible transition times.
 * 10) Terrible soundtrack apart of a few of his movies.
 * 11) He's a terrible man even in real life, he burns his money for no reason and he even likes to make fun of people.
 * 12) SOme of his movies have false advertisings: some posters for rastafarian man have Bob marley on them, but he isn't in that movie at any point, mainly as he is dead.
 * 13) His movies have terrible perverted and sexual innuendos, with so many sex jokes for example, in Middle is not my name there's a scene where a dog rapes a cow!
 * 14) He can't take criticism at all, he sued everyone on YouTube who gave the movie a negative reception and force the video to be taken down.
 * 15) He is racist to Jamaicans, which is odd since he was born in jamaica.
 * 16) All of the characters in his movies are unlikable idiotic, dumb, perverted, and jerks, they are even Megward the Wizards and Mary-sues and gary-stus.
 * 17) The title for his movies JUST LOOK AT THEM!!!!
 * 18) He's terrible reputation makes him worse than Tommy Wiseau, as he forced on of the actresses for one of his movies to take her clothes off on the set, for the scene so the movie could make millions of cash, yet she refused, but still needed to do it anyway.
 * 19) All of his movies have a terrible production time, for too short or a little longer.
 * 20) Cheap and cartoony special effects, that look like they we're rushed.

The only Redeeming Quality

 * Some of the movies he made have good soundtracks.

reception
All of his movies we're unniversally panned, with most of them having a 0% on rotten tomatoes, and we're also box Office flops.

Although despite this, some of his movies like: Asses Underwater & Jar for Wimps became Cult classics.

trvia

 * Almost all of his movies we’re Rated R so far, except for Screw The Pigs which was rated PG-13 and Home Alone: Child Protective Services which was rated TVY (Mainly as it was made for tv).
 * Some people later compared him to David Failburg and Imogen Bitchensen