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Vampires Suck is a 2010 American parody vampire film spoofing The Twilight Saga franchise (mainly the original film and its sequel, New Moon) directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer. It stars Jenn Proske, Matt Lanter, Christopher N. Riggi, Ken Jeong, Anneliese van der Pol, and Arielle Kebbel. Just like the previous Friedberg and Seltzer movies, the film was panned by critics for its humor and plot. 20th Century Fox theatrically released the film on August 18, 2010.

Plot
Edward Sullen strips off his clothes during the saint Salvador festival while Becca Crane rushes to stop him. While running through a fountain, she accidentally splashes water around, causing people to party in the fountain and thus stopping Becca. In a flashback, Becca Crane (Jenn Proske) moves to the Pacific Northwestern town of Sporks to live with her clueless father, Sheriff Frank (Diedrich Bader), after her mother starts an affair with Tiger Woods. Meanwhile, a killing spree is attributed to the Canadians, but the real perpetrators are a group of vampires usually mistaken for the Black Eyed Peas. Becca quickly befriends many students at her new high school, including Jennifer (Anneliese van der Pol). She is also intrigued by the mysterious and aloof Edward Sullen (Matt Lanter), whose odd behavior perplexes her during their biology class.

Later, when Becca is nearly struck by a van in the school parking lot, Edward stops the vehicle by thrusting another student in the van's way. Becca later "dreams" Edward was in her room; in truth he is, but is repulsed by things she does while sleeping. After much research and thought, Becca confronts Edward and tells him she thinks that he is one of the Jonas Brothers. Edward corrects her, saying he is a vampire but that he only consumes animal blood. Despite the danger of being around a vampire, Becca agrees to go to prom with Edward. Later, Becca and Edward kiss passionately in her room. Becca attempts to seduce Edward into having sex, but he abstains.

On Becca's birthday, Edward introduces her to his vampire family. While unwrapping a gift, Becca gets a paper cut. Edward's brother Jeremiah attempts to bite her, but is knocked away. To keep his family away from Becca, Edward distracts them and takes her out to the woods. He then proceeds to break up with Becca, who throws a tantrum after he leaves. Much to her expectance, Becca is attacked by three nomadic vampires, but Edward intervenes and saves her.

Edward's departure leaves Becca heartbroken for months, but she is comforted by her deepening friendship with her childhood friend Jacob White (Christopher N. Riggi). When Becca is accosted in the woods by the nomadic vampires again, Jacob transforms into a Chihuahua as his werewolf pack arrives to save her. Meanwhile, Edward has moved to Rio and is now dating Lady Gaga to get over losing Becca. He is later informed by his sister Iris, via her gift of prophecy, that Becca killed herself. Edward becomes depressed and decides to provoke the "Zolturi", a powerful and narcissistic vampire coven, into killing him by exposing himself in the sunlight in front of humans, thus exposing the existence of vampires. Iris has another vision of Becca's survival as he leaves, but she is unable to warn him.

Iris arrives at Becca's house, and tells her that she has to save Edward by showing him that she is still alive. To Becca's shock, the Zolturi are currently partying at the prom due to the St. Salvatore theme. Jacob appears and demands that Becca choose between him and Edward, but just before she announces her decision, he is distracted by a cat and runs off to chase it. Upon arriving at the prom, Becca is caught between the warring factions of Edward fangirls and Jacob fangirls. She is unable to reach Edward before he exposes himself, figuratively and literally. However, twilight occurs, followed by a new moon and an eclipse, concealing Edward's vampiric nature as Becca gets him to safety. Frank arrives to check on Becca, making her hopeful; however, he thinks supernatural creatures are the prom theme and leaves. After a fight between him and the Zolturi leader, Daro (Ken Jeong), Edward is forced to turn Becca into a vampire, at risk of being killed horribly. He agrees to do so only on the condition that she marry him, which she accepts.

In the mid-credits scene, Edward is struck on the head by the leader of Jacob's fangirls. Edward survives the blow, and the girl is attacked by the newly vampirized Becca as the movie concludes.

Why It Sucks (No pun intended)
TBA
 * 1) Like most other bad parody films, it's filled to the brim with atrocious gross-out jokes, racist jokes, sex jokes and fart jokes.
 * 2) Terrible acting, as with the previous Seltzer & Friedberg movies.

Redeeming Qualities
TBA

Reception
On Rotten Tomatoes the film has an approval rating of 4% based on reviews from 91 critics. The consensus reads: "Witlessly broad and utterly devoid of laughs, Vampires Suck represents a slight step forward for the Friedberg-Seltzer team.". Metacritic, gave it a weighted average score of 18 out of 100 based on reviews from 17 critics, indicating "overwhelming dislike", the worst score for a wide release in 2010. Audiences polled by CinemaScore gave the film an average grade of "C+" on an A+ to F scale.

Trivia

 * This is notably the last Jason Friedberg/Aaron Seltzer film to be financed by Regency Enterprises and distributed by 20th Century Fox; as the duo's next movie, The Starving Games, was released by independent distributor Ketchup Entertainment.